Doctor DanceFan is In

So DanceFan readers, let's make this interactive. Has this weblog raised any questions that I can answer for you from a strip club patron, and lover of lovely dancers, perspective?

I'll start us out for practice. Here's a question that comes up occsionally in a club and that I've been thinking about during my New Year's resolution life-examing week:

Is it cheating for a married man to go to a club alone and get lapdances?

It's a good question .

I heard a radio psychologist (No, not Dr. Laura) discussing it one day. Her take was: single men - go for it all you like. Married men - it's definitely cheating.

Some dancers ask me if I'm married, some don't. Most who ask will immediately rationalize it for me: "it's not like this is cheating. It's safe. It's only a lapdance." After all, I'm not dating any of these women and there is no relationship outside of the fantasy world of the club. And there's certainly no fucking.

So where does the right answer fall?

My answer: I am, married that is. And it is, cheating that is.

I have no illusions about that. It's spending time and treasure and emotional energy outside of my family. It's cheating.

But I can live with it. It's part of me and I've made peace with it. I keep it contained, in a box. And I live my life. I love my wife. I'm a good father for my boys. And I go to the club. Complex, but real.

Readers, what say you?