Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Feature Dancers: Poodle Skirts and Anal Scenes

I started reminiscing back in January about Feature Dancers in general (here), and about some Features that I've seen and met in specific. Starting with Felecia, the Queen of Lesbian Porn.

Tonight, for some reason, I was remembering one of my favorite Feature Dance performers:

Inari Vachs (photo gallery here)

I first heard of Inari Vachs from reading about her winning an AVN award, I believe for "best blowjob" scene of whatever year. What a strange name for a porn star, I thought. I'll have to find one of her videos. Since then I've seen several of her scenes, although I would be hard pressed to tell you what the titles were. I'm thinking that some of them were from Vivid Video - that she may have been or is a Vivid Girl. Inari is certainly talented in the particular category that she won her award for. In the scenes that I have seen her in, she is an expert at the long, slobbery, eye-contact, blowjob. An expert. But then again, she is talented at all aspects of porn. I've seen her in girl-guy, girl-girl, gang bang, and anal scenes. She's a porn trooper.

Inari is a beautiful girl. All natural. Petite, but solid. Small perky breats. Beautiful blonde hair. A shapely ass. An all around girl-next-door beauty. She seems to be present and enjoying every scene, not just posing for the camera. And most importantly, she smiles a lot during sex - a beautiful smile. Her most identifying trait is her O-face, which is very distinct, in which she draws up her upper lip and starts a giving birth breathing pattern with little yelps and then rolls her eyes up into her head as she comes. I've seen it many times on video. It's cute. Although I'm not entirely sure what it sounds like, because I usually watch porn with the sound down!

So, imagine my excitement when I saw Inari Vach's name on a marquee at a chain strip club as a coming attraction. I was there at the appointed hour, taking my place at the tiprail front and center of the stage. I don't recall if I had any lapdances that night, although it's very likely that I did. Mainly, I was there for Inari.

Finally, the time came. The lights went down. The tiprail filled up. And the DJ went into his full stadium-jam porn star introduction with lights and smoke. And without further ado, Inari came down the middle aisle to the vibrant guitar riffs of Dick Dale. (I know it was Dick Dale because I talked later with her assistant / light man / sound man / poster hander outer / etc.)

Dick Dale music and a Poodle Skirt. I kid you not. Inari was decked out in full 1950's regalia. She was beautiful and the outfit was very sexy. Especially as it came off of her over the course of the next three songs. Inari knows how to work a stage and a tiprail and was very smooth and professional. As I recall, the third song involved a towel and lotion dripped off her body - quickly accompanied by the handing out of her posters to the more vocal of the tiprail drooling monkeys (yours truly included).

It was a great show. Hot. And unique with the Poodle Skirt.

Freshened up after her stage show, Inari went to a booth in the back that was set up for merchandising. You could buy a video or DVD from her or have your poster signed by her. While she was standing there naked. Yeow! Given that she was what I was there for, I took my place in line with my poster to have it signed.

Eventually, it was my turn. There I found myself, face to face in a tight space with a very beautiful and very sexy and very naked Inari Vachs. And there was that smile! Beautiful.

Some small talk was necessary as she signed my poster, so I babbled out the only thing that I could think to say, which was "I enjoy your movies". She looked me right in the eye and asked the impossible question. "Oh really. Which movie did you like the best?"

As I said before, I usually see disjointed scenes without particularly paying attention to the title of the movie. I've seen more since that night and have paid attention to them. For example, the "Backseat Driver" series from Toxxxic Video is pretty good and she is always good in them. "Girls night Out" with porn star Chandler is pretty good too. But on that night, that was a tough question.

Thinking quickly on my feet was difficult, because all of the blood had already left my brain and gone elsewhere. (I was standing toe to toe with a naked porn star, after all!)

"Cry Babies", I said quickly. "I liked Cry Babies". For some reason I could remember that title. Inari's scene in "Cry Babies" essentially involved a 20 minute anal pounding by some guy with minimal dialogue other than her pretending to be crying the whole time. It wasn't violent or extreme, just campy. She was role-playing the crying. At least I think she was crying. I had the sound down. But visually, it was a great scene.

Inari smiled a big beautiful smile at me as she signed my poster. "No one has ever answered that one to me before", she said. She seemed pleased.

Time was up and I moved out of the booth for the next mook to step up. And that was my encounter with the beautiful, natural, and sexy Ms. Inari Vachs. A unique professional in a plastic business.

As a postscript: I went out the next day and bought a Dick Dale CD. I listen to it now and then and remember her and her Poodle Skirt.

I'll never forget her smile. Thank you, Inari.


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