Bondage in a Bag

I have a dilemma. A problem. A quandry. Seriously. And it started with a pervy shopping trip.

My dilemma is physical. It's an object. Or rather, a collection of objects within a object.

A backpack, to be specific, average in appearance but mysterious in nature.

A plain black backpack that rides in the trunk of my car wherever I go. Always there. I see it. I know it's there. Yet, untouched.

The contents of the backpack are.....well, let's just say interesting. And kinky.

We'll get back to that in a minute.

How did it get there? Hmmmm.

Let's go back in time, years ago, to a late night stop on one of many business trips on the road. In addition to frequenting strip clubs on the road, I have been known to stop at an adult bookstore or two. One chain adult superstore in particular that can be found at out-of-the-way exits on interstate highways. I browse at length. For a DVD. Or a magazine. Or, if I'm feeling frisky, a toy. I actually love to shop for sex toys. Love it. Usually to no avail, as my Mrs. is absolutely and totally uninterested in them. Everything I've brought home over the years has been tried once and then relegated to a box on the top shelf of the closet never to be seen again.

So there I was one night, on the road at the adult superstore, browsing. Feeling frisky. Knowing the likely result but wanting to believe that maybe this time my purchases would not be in vain. Browsing through the usual devices. Plastic. Gel. Cyberskin. Beads. Vibrating. Non-vibrating. Getting hornier as I shopped. Lost in my internal world. And then I wandered into a new section.

Leather. BDSM. Restraints. Whips. Chains. Yeow! Now my lizard brain was fully engaged and the possibilities unfolded before me. My skin tingled and I was fully alive. I thought. I dreamed. I fantasized. And, eventually, I selected.

Not just one item. A collection. A very naughty collection.

Over the next week I got the items out of the bag and looked at them. I thought about them. And I added some household items to the collection.

Then I came to my senses. I woke up. And I knew. These could not be shared. They would not be tried and banished to the box. They would be thrown out and would earn me some scorn in the process. I would never live down the fact that I had bought them in the first place. I knew.

So, I hid them. I made two additional purchases: a backpack and a padlock. I loaded the backpack with my secret purchases and I locked it up by placing the padlock through the holes in the zippers so that it could not be opened. And I hid it. First in my attic. Later in my garage. And finally, when it was almost discovered, in the trunk of my car where it has remained. When I change cars or rent cars it goes with me. Transferred from car to car. Never opened. Until tonight, when I opened it to remember.

Laid out on my hotel bed tonight are the contents:

- red leather bra and panty set
- red leather ankle restraints (1 pair)
- red leather wrist restraints (1 pair)
- red leather collar
- red leather ball gag with black rubber ball
- red braided pet leashes(2) (to loop around feet of bed and clip to ankle restraints, purchased new for this purpose)
- 4 metal double-ended clips
- copy of "Erotic Bondage Handbook" by Jay Wiseman
- several lengths of soft nylon cord
- crop: black with simulated leather handle
- flogger: black leather strips with studded black leather braided handle.
- receipt for $191 dated September 2000

Yeah. All high quality. All unused. All unknown to anyone but me.

My dilemma? What in the world am I going to do with this backpack.

It's making me nervous driving it around in the trunk of my car. I keep imagining getting pulled over for some moving violation, getting my car searched, and getting arrested for having a "rape kit" in my trunk. (Melodramatic, I know. But I saw that on a made-for-TV movie once.) That wouldn't be good. Mainly, though, it's just the psychic wear and tear on me moving the bag from trunk to trunk all of the time that's getting to me. It would be one thing if I was getting some benefit from the contents. But I'm not. I've just been continuously hiding it for five years now. Wow.

My dilemma? What in the world am I going to do with this backpack?

Well, for starters, for tonight anyway, I'm just going to repack it and relock it and re-hide it. Back in the trunk.

And then what? It's making me tired.